Motherhood is a journey into the unknown, but that doesn't mean you have to be unprepared. Taking the time to prioritize your physical health through intentional pre and postnatal fitness can not only help you navigate the challenges of motherhood with greater ease, but it can also instill confidence and strength that will serve you and your family for years to come.
Whether it is your first or third baby, preparing for birth and early postpartum (more unknowns) is essential for every expectant Mother/Birthing Parent.
After completing the pregnancy marathon, which takes a huge toll on our bodies and minds, we then have to complete the main power event during labour and birth. Just like any athlete, we need to prepare ourselves for the main event. Can you imagine if Serena Williams had not trained or prepared for her matches?! Imagine the physical and mental damage she could of been putting herself at risk of.
After giving birth, you start your new season of life as a Mom/Parent. The early postpartum stage, is often referred to as the 4th Trimester (the first 3 months of babies life). Your baby is developing and learning as they go, and so are you. But there are things you can do to better equip yourself and your Partner, so that you have the tools, skills, and resources to take on any challenges that may come your way.
Physical Activity & Exercise
I know you have heard this before, but maintaining a moderate level of physical activity and exercise during pregnancy can help you reduce your risk of gestational diabetes, pre-eclampsia, and postpartum depression. But it does so much more! We can, and should, get more specific about what kinds of exercises you should be doing.
Exercises to help strengthen your body and core for pushing.
Exercises to keep your upper body strong for all the carrying and rocking you are going to do.
Core exercises to help minimize your diastasis recti.
Exercises to help relax your muscles, because muscles that can fully relax are better functioning= stronger.
Exercises to help you connect to your pelvic floor muscles.
Breathing exercises.
Do I need a Birth Plan?
Having a birth plan is important. But it most likely will get thrown out the window once shit starts going down. So instead:
Get educated about your pain management/medication options and their effects (on you and baby). What are you comfortable with? What is a hard no?
Think about where you want to birth. What positions you want to/might labour in?
Ask your OB/Midwife what factors they consider when they decide it is time for an emergency c-section?
Let your OB/Midwife know what you want and what you don’t want.
Think of things that could calm and ground you ie music, visuals, a mantra, massage, breathing patterns.
Talk about all of the above with your Partner.
Your Mental Health
This is not just a physical transformation and transition, it is also a HUGE mental and emotional one. Of course exercise and movement can help minimize stress, anxiety, and depression, but pregnancy and birth can be traumatic experiences. The grief and trauma one can experience does not have to be drastic, monumental, and life threatening. It could be something simpler like the OB and nurses telling you, you are pushing wrong…even though you know you are not because you know your body best. (Yes this happened to me)
No one can prepare you for what pregnancy, childbirth, and postpartum will be like. You do not know for sure how you will react in certain situations.
That is why seeking out support in the form of a Perinatal and Maternal Mental Health Therapist is important. They create a safe space for you, help you feel seen, and will help you navigate the challenges you face. Finding support in family, friends, and a Mom group is important too. Take time to create a solid support system that you know you can depend on for walks, talks, food, babysitting, and laughs. And let's be honest, a whole bunch of crying.
Baby Registry vs Mom/Birthing Parent Registry
Making sure that you have the essential items for your baby(ies) in those first few months is important. Things like diapers, wipes, bottles, swaddles, onesies, toques, bassinet, carseat, stroller, vitamin D, and a thermometer. If you are breastfeeding, you have their food covered, but I breastfeed and supplemented with formula because I needed a break sometimes, so we also had formula on that essentials list. Personally, those were the things we used right away for our twins. We didn’t use their cribs until they were 3ish months old (they shared a bassinet in our room first), we didn’t use high chairs until they were 5ish months old, and we had way more infant toys than we needed. It was definitely nice to have some of those things ready, so we weren’t scrambling or having to pay full price for them (thank you Friends and Facebook Marketplace!). But they did not help me figure out breastfeeding, they did not help me work through my postnatal anxiety, and I definitely did not use them to get acquainted with my new postpartum body.
Again, remember that every baby is different, their needs will be different, and what works for you will be different, so the essentials needed will be different.
Don’t get me wrong buying and receiving baby clothing and gear is wonderful. Putting my kiddos in matching Adidas t-shirts was flipping adorable and made me extremely giddy. Everything we got we were extremely grateful for. But I was more grateful for the lunches and dinners that were dropped off. The mental health support. The visits to my pelvic floor physiotherapist when I kept peeing myself walking downhill. The alone time I was given because a family member was babysitting. Having any mental load taken away from me. That is why I think it is more influential to have a Mom/Birthing Parent Registry (there can be stuff on there for the Partner/Dad too!). Things that are going to make that early postpartum a little smoother. Things like:
Meal trains
Gift Certificates for Lactation Consultants, Pelvic Floor Physiotherapy, Massage, Postnatal Mental Health Support etc.
Gift cards for gas, groceries, nursing clothing etc.
Offering to clean dishes, vacuum the house, or shovel the snow.
DIY Coupons to take their dogs for walks. Or if they have a toddler, taking them to the park or library so that they feel special and the Parents don’t feel guilty.
Just like how we would educate ourselves, prepare, and train for a marathon, expectant Mothers/Birthing parents should prepare themselves for the physical and mental changes that come with pregnancy, childbirth, and the early postpartum period. Becoming a Parent involves so much self-sacrifice, but that does not mean that we do not deserve to be happy and to feel good.